I'm sure most people can be categorized as likeable enough, and I'm certain there's a few of you that would caution me that disdain for my fellow man will get me a one-way ticket to H-E double hockey sticks, but after my last couple depos, I've simply decided to add the entire free world to my s#!t list.

My dislike for the human race began at the onset of a 450-page day, whereupon after three questions I had to interrupt the depo to stop the witness from speaking over everyone else in the room (a new personal record); I then proceeded to bark at this tool innumerable times during the remainder of the day for the same offense. He was one of these "born salesman" types who just wanted to proclaim his innocence, plead his case, and he wasn't gonna wait for some attorney to ask him questions about it. Opposing counsel said nothing all day, and the guy taking the depo wasn't about to cut off the testimony. He just kept supplying this babbling fool with enough rope to hang himself and his extended family (including pets), and with each tirade the noose got a little more snug. I just took my whoopin' like Gerry Cooney and hoped for a better day tomorrow.

As the fates would have it, tomorrow came, and, yes, Annie, the sun did come out... a cold, black, hateful sun. Still punchy from Monday, next up was a 350-page Danish inventor in an IP case whose English was only marginally better than the chef from The Muppet Show -- Swedish, Danish, what's the difference? I would ask this guy to repeat things three and four times, and even going back to the tape, I still don't have a freakin' clue what he was saying. Might put in a couple extra errata sheets on this one.

"There are two things I can't stand in this world: People who are intolerant of other people's cultures... and the Dutch" - Michael Caine as Nigel Powers in Goldmember

   1911-2004  

You know, this guy was the last presidential President we've had, and he left office 16 years ago. The interim has been filled with a philandering hillbilly and a couple of lessers-of-two-evils (with another one on the way in November... regardless of the outcome). Sad day, indeed.

"Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first." - Ronald Reagan

Yes, I know to you technophiles out there thumb drives are soooo last week, but if history is any indicator, this now ubiquitous technology will be fully embraced en masse by the reporting profession shortly before the premiere of Shrek 9... so humor me.

If you haven't purchased one of these digit-sized marvels -- and you're not still mired up to your armpits in DOS -- go to {insert name of local electronics store here}, drop the fiddy bucks and simplify your life. Need to move large audio files between computers? Spend 10 minutes burning a CD... or drag and drop 'em to your thumb drive in about 10 seconds. Need to slip counsel a dirty ASCII but neither of you have a floppy drive? You know the drill.

My favorite stress reducer? At the conclusion of depos from hell (which is all of them lately), I back up the job with the audio onto my thumb drive, then jam that sucker in my pocket. If my laptop gets swiped at the airport on the way home, life sucks, but I've still got the job. Computer gets concrete poisoning while loading it into my car, nuking the hard drive? Not a problem.

Lastly, if you're a complete gadgetaholic like me and the missus, check out the Intellistick brand of drives. They fit a standard USB port but are no thicker than a credit card, fitting easily in your wallet alongside your maxed-out Visa.

"Somebody who thinks logically is a nice contrast to the real world" - Unknown, The Law of Thumb