Congratulations, Lance!

This guy is one of my idols. I haven't ridden a bike in 20 years and probably won't ever again, but I still wanna be like Lance. He personifies two of my favorite expressions: "Shut up and quit whining!" and "Life sucks, get a f*#%ing helmet!" Oh, yeah, and he's dating Sheryl Crow.

"You know, once I was thinking of quitting when I was diagnosed with brain, lung and testicular cancer all at the same time. But with the love and support of my friends and family, I got back on the bike and won the Tour de France five times in a row. But I'm sure you have a good reason to quit." - Lance Armstrong, from Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story