8/5/2003
Oh, joy. I'm actually a huge fan of the TSA. I was flying extensively for work before, during and after 9/11, and I've gotta say that the TSA screeners are infinitely better than the mouth-breathing carnival rejects that used to herd us cattle through the system.
Case in point, I almost got in a screaming match with a Neanderthal at the Corpus Christi airport in October of '01 because, rather than observing me drink from my bottle of Dasani to ensure it wasn't some flammable chemical (a logical request), he insisted I x-ray it. I tried to explain the nuances of the x-ray machine, how it wasn't a magical box that was going to see anything in the water that we couldn't see with the naked eye. This garnered an irate approach by the National Guardsmen, so I opted to x-ray my crystal-clear sparking water, all the while hoping the guy sitting behind me in 13D wasn't toting a bottle of benzene with an Evian label on it.
But back to increased electronics scrutiny at airports in the near term. I flew last week with my machine, and I've finally perfected a system that is 80% effective in expediting my journey through security. I have multiple mesh bags containing all the various bits in my machine case. When I get to the x-ray machine, I whip out my machine, laptop and the net bags containing all the questionable-lookin' stuff, throw them in a tote, and let 'em have a field day with it. I send my machine case through empty; it's the only way. I don't know exactly what they train the TSA screeners to look for, but you put a metal tripod with a Stentura charger wrapped around it on the conveyor belt, when your bag hits the radar screen, watch his face, and you can actually see the exact moment the screener almost soils himself. It's just easier for everyone to lay it all out in the open.
Of course, that said, I'm probably due for the body cavity search next time.
